When the 3 of Swords appears in a tarot reading about how someone feels about you, it speaks to deep emotional pain, disappointment, or even betrayal. This isn’t a lighthearted card—it reveals that the person is either hurting because of you, hurting over you, or hurting without being able to express it.
Whether you’re in a committed relationship, navigating a breakup, or in silence with someone you care about, the 3 of Swords tells us: the heart is wounded, and the pain is real.
In this in-depth post, we’ll explore:
- Upright and reversed meanings of the 3 of Swords as feelings
- How this card shows up in love, loss, and complex emotional dynamics
- What kind of pain they may be holding onto
- Tarot combinations that reveal deeper emotional truth
- Amazon affiliate tools to support healing and communication
The 3 of Swords: The Tarot’s Heartbreak Card
In the Rider-Waite deck, the 3 of Swords depicts a heart pierced by three swords, set against a backdrop of storm clouds and rain. It symbolizes grief, emotional separation, sorrow, and heartbreak.
Element: Air
Zodiac Sign: Libra
Keywords: Heartache, separation, emotional wounds, sadness, betrayal
When this card represents someone’s feelings for you, it means they are in pain—whether they caused it, received it, or are still carrying it silently.
✅ Upright 3 of Swords as Feelings: “My Heart Hurts”
When upright, this card shows that someone is feeling:
- Hurt or betrayed by something that occurred between you
- A sense of loss, mourning, or emotional devastation
- Regret, sadness, or an inability to move forward emotionally
- Like their heart is still bleeding, even if they hide it behind silence or pride
Emotional Insights:
| Feeling | What It May Look Like |
|---|---|
| Deep sadness | Avoiding you, withdrawing, or crying in private |
| Silent suffering | Watching from afar but saying nothing |
| Guilt or shame | Feeling responsible for hurting you—but unsure how to fix it |
| Lingering pain | Still not over the breakup or past arguments—even months later |
“Their heart is broken—even if you can’t see the cracks.”
This card can appear when someone is devastated that you left, hurting because they did, or simply too emotionally raw to speak.
⚠️ Reversed 3 of Swords as Feelings: Healing, Avoidance, or Emotional Numbness
In reverse, the emotional tone shifts:
- They may be in the process of healing but are still fragile
- They’re suppressing their pain or pretending they’ve moved on
- In some cases, they’re numb to emotion or avoiding vulnerability altogether
Reversed Feeling Themes:
| What They’re Feeling | Behavior You Might See |
|---|---|
| Trying to move on | Overly cheerful, posting online, but faking happiness |
| Emotional shutdown | Refusing to talk, stonewalling, acting indifferent |
| Fragile healing | May be open to reconnection—but terrified of being hurt again |
| Guilt hidden beneath silence | “Ghosting” out of shame or self-loathing, not rejection |
“They may be healing—but every reminder of you still stings.”
3 of Swords Feelings in Romantic Contexts
In a New Connection:
- They may not be fully available emotionally
- Past heartbreak is likely affecting how they feel about you
- They’re afraid to open their heart again, even if they’re interested
In a Breakup or No Contact:
- They are grieving, whether they were the leaver or the left
- This person may be in emotional agony, regret, or shock
- They still care—but their pain makes it hard to reach out
In Ongoing Relationships:
- They may feel wounded by something you said/did, even unintentionally
- There could be an emotional wall built around past unresolved pain
- Indicates a need for open-hearted, honest conversation
“This is the card of pain—but also of the heart that still remembers.”
Emotional Psychology Behind the 3 of Swords
Someone feeling this card likely:
- Overthinks emotional wounds—reliving conversations, betrayals, or losses
- Has an unhealed heart wound—possibly from you or from another connection
- May be stuck in grief, regret, or fear of future hurt
- Wants emotional connection—but feels unsafe being vulnerable again
This card also points to inner conflict between love and protection.
Reader Case: “He Blocked Me—But I Know He Still Loves Me”
Name: Lavanya (alias)
Situation: Her ex blocked her everywhere after a fight. She asked if he still felt anything.
Cards Pulled: 3 of Swords upright + Page of Cups reversed
Interpretation:
He was deeply hurt but emotionally immature. He didn’t know how to handle the pain and chose avoidance over expression. Blocking her was an act of self-preservation, not lack of love.
“I didn’t know how to handle my emotions, so I ran.”
The 3 of Swords revealed the pain he carried underneath his silence.
Emotional Healing Curve – 3 of Swords as Feelings
3 of Swords Emotional Process
|
|
| Intense Emotional Pain (Grief)
| Withdrawal, Guilt, or Suppressed Emotion
| Silent Reflection or Emotional Avoidance
| Wound or Shock from Separation, Betrayal, or Truth
|
|____________________________________________________________
Pain ➝ Grief ➝ Shutdown ➝ Healing ➝ Closure or Reconnection
This shows how emotional healing from the 3 of Swords often follows a slow, layered journey.
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|---|---|---|
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3 of Swords in Twin Flame & Soulmate Dynamics
In twin flame or soulmate readings, the 3 of Swords appears during one of the most difficult but spiritually significant stages of the connection—the separation or surrender phase.
What They’re Feeling Spiritually:
- Deep emotional pain, even if they’ve gone silent
- Mourning the spiritual connection while avoiding the intensity
- A strong desire to reconnect but blocked by ego, fear, or external obstacles
- Feeling like they’ve “failed” the mission or wounded their divine counterpart
“They feel everything—and that’s why they’re pulling away.”
This card shows up when:
- A twin runner is triggered and needs space
- One partner is healing childhood wounds through the mirror of the connection
- The soul knows the love is real—but the heart is too hurt to engage
In these cases, healing must happen individually before union or reunion can occur.
Tarot Pairings That Clarify the 3 of Swords as Feelings
When you pull the 3 of Swords, the surrounding cards tell you what kind of pain they feel, and whether healing or reconnection is possible.
| Card Pairing | Emotional Meaning |
|---|---|
| 3 of Swords + 2 of Cups | They’re heartbroken over a lost soulmate or damaged love |
| 3 of Swords + Justice | They feel regret or guilt and want to make things right |
| 3 of Swords + The Tower | The pain was sudden, unexpected, and emotionally destabilizing |
| 3 of Swords + Knight of Cups | Despite the heartbreak, they still want to offer love or an apology |
| 3 of Swords + Four of Swords | Emotional retreat—they’re trying to heal in silence |
These pairings help you interpret whether this is a temporary heartache, a long-term grief, or a call to reconnect and resolve.
✍️ Guided Journaling Prompts: Processing the 3 of Swords Energy
Whether you’ve drawn the 3 of Swords in your own reading or you’re feeling its effects in someone else, use these journaling prompts to reflect and release:
- What pain am I still carrying—and how is it affecting the love I allow into my life?
- Did this heartbreak come from loss, betrayal, or expectation?
- Am I grieving the person—or the version of the story I created with them?
- What lesson does this pain teach me about my emotional patterns?
- How can I honor my grief while moving toward peace?
These reflections help you integrate heartbreak into healing, not carry it as emotional baggage.
Reader Story: “He Was in Pain, But I Wasn’t the Enemy”
Name: Meera (alias)
Situation: After a short but intense romantic connection, the man she was dating suddenly cut ties and said he wasn’t “ready.”
Cards Pulled: 3 of Swords + 5 of Pentacles
Interpretation:
He was dealing with abandonment issues from a previous relationship and feared emotional rejection. Though Meera offered safety, his unhealed wounds made him retreat in self-preservation.
“He wasn’t running from me. He was running from the version of himself that always ends up hurt.”
The 3 of Swords wasn’t just his pain—it was a mirror of what still needed to be healed.
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|---|---|---|
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Final Interpretation: What 3 of Swords Really Means as Feelings
When someone feels the 3 of Swords toward you, they are:
- Hurting—deeply, and often silently
- Emotionally fragmented—torn between what they felt and what went wrong
- Possibly blaming themselves, or blaming you, depending on the story
- Grieving a connection that meant something, but didn’t unfold the way they hoped
“They may still love you—but love is currently dressed in pain.”
They are not over it. Even if they pretend they are.
Summary: 3 of Swords as Feelings
- Upright: Grief, heartbreak, betrayal, sadness, emotional loss
- Reversed: Suppressed emotions, emotional numbness, slow healing
- In Romance: They feel deeply—but are hurting too much to connect clearly
- Emotionally: Wounded, grieving, or silently processing heartbreak
- Spiritually: A karmic wound is active—healing may lead to future clarity or closure
Final Reflection
Ask yourself or your deck:
“Is this heartbreak pointing to rejection—or redirection into healing?”
The 3 of Swords teaches:
“Pain is not the end of love—but the doorway into emotional truth.”